“That clumsy Toudou is just fine. And you know, you don’t have to worry about the past. I – we want to be with that Toudou.”
Tanaka’s demeanor changed. The clear, earnest voice quickened my heartbeat. Tanaka looked straight at me.
Suddenly, a loud engine sound came from behind us. Looking back, a large truck was driving through the shopping district.
The speed was a bit fast, but the driver wasn’t sleeping. They were gripping the steering wheel firmly. I stopped to watch the truck. The truck passed through without incident.
“This time it’s alright.”
For some reason, there was a warm sensation around my arm. To my surprise, I had embraced Tanaka protectively.
“Why did I act this way?” I wondered.
“Hey, Toudou, ahaha… This place doesn’t have many accidents, so it’s fine. You really don’t need to worry so much. Hugging is a bit embarrassing, you know. Huh, Toudou?”
My limbs wouldn’t stop trembling. My body wasn’t listening to me. This was a first. Ah, I see, I was afraid of Tanaka getting hurt. This is what fear feels like.
“…I was mistaken.”
“Hmm? Hey, let’s rest on a bench in the park, it’s just a little further.”
I nodded and followed Tanaka to the park, holding her hand.
Sitting on the bench, I took a deep breath.
“Tanaka, there’s something I need to apologize for.”
Sitting on the bench, I looked up at the sky. The clouds were very beautiful. Yes, I can recognize that they are beautiful – an important sense of a normal person.
I don’t understand the meaning of my earlier actions, but it is a very serious matter. I can’t ignore it. The depths of my heart are throbbing.
“Huh? What is it, Toudou hasn’t done anything wrong.”
“No, I have committed an unforgivable sin against Tanaka.”
I mustn’t make Tanaka sad. I can’t let her realize that I’ve forgotten our memories. I must not hurt Tanaka anymore.
Why did I make that choice?
–Wasn’t it just my own self-defense? To keep myself from feeling deeply saddened.
–Wasn’t it just my own self-sacrifice? To keep from making Tanaka sad.
“That day… the day I went on a date with Tanaka – I lost all my memories of Tanaka.”
Tanaka leaned back on the bench and let out a deep sigh.
“I see, so that’s it. Well, at least you finally told me. Thanks, Toudou is really bad at lying.”
I was shocked.
“You knew?”
“I had a vague feeling, you know. Toudou looked so pained and sad when looking at me. And you forgot the photos you had on your phone.”
“I’m sorry, Tanaka.”
“But we did all kinds of things together, right? It was such a fun memory.”
“I really don’t remember, but sometimes those scenes do come to mind.”
“It must be painful, huh? Then, you don’t have to force yourself to remember. Let’s just make new memories together, like going to the shopping center, eating cake, drinking juice, working part-time jobs… Yeah–“
Tanaka gently touched my hand.
“No matter how many times it fades, I’ll make new memories with you again and again.”
–My soul trembled. Something etched within me stirred.
I clawed at my chest. I don’t want to make such a dear person say sad things. Tanaka looks like she’s about to cry.
I’ve always hated seeing girls cry sadly. I lost an important person in that elementary school. She was always crying sadly.
I don’t want to regret anymore.
“I thought the me who lost my memories was no longer myself. But I am still me.”
“Of course! Toudou is Toudou!”
“I see…”
Tanaka’s warmth triggered a switch to the intense emotions of that day.
Countless versions of myself sleeping within me surfaced. Unfamiliar memories stormed through me.
Intense pain assaulting my entire body denies the current me. This pain is a limiter to prevent myself from being destroyed.
I should just [reset] that –
READ THE ORIGINAL TRANSLATION AT GADGETIZEDPANDA.COM
Resetting isn’t just erasing emotions, going beyond the limit is true [resetting]. But an imperfect one erases memories.
I don’t remember the girl in front of me. Why did I try to handle this alone? Why did I try to hide it?
Resetting is just an ability, not something sinful. The problem lies in how I use it.
Then, I should change myself.
Face this resetting power –
Something etched into my soul is violently shaking. My entire body’s blood is boiling. I don’t want to feel that. A knife-like pain runs through my heart. That’s just an illusion.
The most important thing to me now is –
“The memories I’ve etched into my soul with Tanaka.”
I stood up. I looked up at the sky. Our hands are linked, and I won’t let go. The surging emotions were becoming even more intense. I now understand the nature of this [emotion] – it is the feelings I have built up…it is love.
“I will attempt to restore the memory reset. Tanaka, please watch over me.”
“O-Okay, Toudou. Your eyes are… no, I’ll keep watch…”
Tanaka nodded. Then I closed my eyes. The high-speed thinking is accelerating. This acceleration has already exceeded the limit.
The high-speed thinking tells me there is a 99-9% chance of failure. But I don’t care about that. The surging emotions are denying my reason.
Erasing emotions alone is not a true reset. Exceeding the limit is not a true reset either.
The faint remnant of a reset within me, the sensation of going beyond the limit – that is not enough.
I must surpass that —
The me now will not erase the memories of those important to me!!
The burden on my brain is limiting the reset. I will reset.
I will reset the limit that tries to break the delicate brain cells.
I will reset the limit that tries to stop my heartbeat.
Reset, reset, reset, reset–
All of this is to find Tanaka and our memories – I will repeatedly reset.
One misstep and I could lose all my memories, becoming a mere shell.
The sound of glass shattering. [Switch].
The word “switch” comes to mind, but I don’t know its power. Yet, I feel a surge of strength.
The days I’ve spent with everyone flood my brain, overwhelming it.
The high-speed thinking has [switched] and evolved into parallel processing.
Even as the wall of limits tries to burn through my thoughts, thousands of thoughts defend against it–
Come to think of it, I’ve been strange ever since resetting Hanazono. I couldn’t recall the lost memories and emotions. That was my normal. Inexplicable surging emotions burned my heart. That evolved the reset, that became the nourishment to surpass the reset.
The reset with Hanazono, the reset with Tanaka. This is different from any other reset.
I don’t call Hanazono “Hana-chan”.
I never saved Tanaka from a truck.
But I knew that. Then, remember, remember, remember, remember, remember!!!!
“——–!!”
–My surging emotion releases the [memories] engraved in my soul.
A massive amount of information assaults my brain. Even parallel thinking cannot handle the negative emotions. The cost of erasing memories is weighing on me now. The limit is about to be reached. Any further and I’ll become a lost soul, forgetting everything–
“Such a limit can simply be reset!!!”
The evolved reset through the [Switch]–
As long as I have the memories of Tanaka and Hanazono, I’ll never make them sad again! I will never lose to myself again!
These girls are precious to me.
Something that had been shrouding my soul bursts free–
“This is my [Reset].”
The buzzing in my head quiets. The only thing I can feel now is the warmth of Tanaka’s hand in mine.
It’s so wonderfully warm and comforting…
I open my eyes and gaze at Tanaka.
“I was captivated by Tanaka’s singing voice. Tanaka drinking juice was so adorable. I took so many photos. And I saved Tanaka from being hit by a truck. I’m so glad she’s safe.”
“–Huh? Wh-What?”
“I’m back, Tanaka. I’m alright now. …T-Tanaka? Don’t cry. My memories have returned.”
Tanaka was shedding tears, but they were not tears of sadness.
Because Tanaka was smiling so beautifully–
“Welcome back, Toudou… I believed in you, you know.”
The girl next to me was crying. But she looked so happy, so joyful… so adorable.
“A youth that begins with a reset, huh… I really am an awkward guy.”
My eyes felt hot. This is not sweat. These are tears of joy…
The precious [memories] etched into my soul have permeated my heart–
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