The Heroic Tale Of A Villainous Prince Chapter 62

Episode 62: The Night Sky Conceals Shadows

 
I was about to call out to Makina to prepare refreshments for Charl, who was diligently training with her sword outside. But then, I remembered that Ross had just gone to talk to Makina.
 
Makina has become so reliable as my right-hand person that it’s almost a habit for me to depend on her. That’s why her strange behavior has been so unsettling.
 
At first, I thought it might have been due to her contact with Lucille, but her odd behavior started even before that. When I tried to probe, she acted as if nothing was wrong… no, it was more like she was determined not to let me know anything.
 
That made me feel both lonely and shocked.
 
Makina and I are the same age, and because of that, there are things we find hard to talk about. I don’t expect her to share everything; everyone has their secrets.
 
But Makina’s behavior felt different.
 
It wasn’t just hiding something; it was a clear [rejection] towards me.
 
We’ve been together since we were kids, growing up and working side by side. I trust her as my right-hand person. So, to feel this level of rejection from Makina… it was more shocking than I realized.
 
I really want to ask her directly. But if I do, she’ll likely dodge and deflect again, as she’s good at that.
 
I thought of leaving it to Ross, who’s like a parent to us, and waiting for Makina to open up…
 
(…No. That’s what happened with Leo too.)
 
Just as I stepped outside with the refreshments, I stopped in my tracks.
 
The memory of my fight with Leo surfaced. After everything that happened, I realized I was about to make the same mistake.
 
…Am I still afraid to face those close to me?
 
“Ah… damn it. I’m such an idiot.”
 
“Al?”
 
“…!”
 
Charl, likely done with her training, stood in front of me, her eyes wide in surprise.
 
“What’s wrong? Why are you standing here alone…?”
 
“I brought refreshments… but I guess I’m a bit late.”
 
“That’s not true… thank you. I’m happy.”
 
Charl accepted the refreshments (just some water and a towel to wipe off sweat) with a somewhat awkward expression.
 
“Are you troubled by something?”
 
“…Why do you think that?”
 
“You looked like it. Plus, I heard you call yourself an idiot, so I got worried…”
 
…It seems my muttering had reached Charl’s ears.
 
Great. My fiancée heard me talking to myself.
 
“Kill me now…”
 
“Huh!? Why so suddenly…!?”
 
“…No, don’t worry about it. It’s just my embarrassment talking.”
 
It’s mortifying. But I’m glad Makina wasn’t around. If she’d seen this, she’d definitely tease me with something like, “Oh, Al-sama is at that age. These things happen.”
 
“…”
 
“Al?”
 
Remembering the incident with Leo, I realized that repeating the same mistake mistakes again and again.
 
I know that holding it inside and pushing it away again won’t end well.
 
“…Yes, I’m troubled.”
 
“I can listen if you want. I can do at least that much…”
 
“I know. Actually, I’d prefer if you did, Charl.”
 
“…Really?”
 
“…Sorry, is it a bother?”
 
“No, not at all! It’s just…”
 
Charl looked away, seemingly embarrassed.
 
“…I’m just happy. Happy that you’re relying on me, especially now when I’ve been feeling so powerless…”
 
“Powerless? But Charl, I think you’re strong. Stronger than me, at least.”
 
“…Huh?”
 
“You reached out to Eline and connected with her heart. You united the knights during the incident in the capital. Those are things I couldn’t do. That’s your strength.”
 
“…”
 
“…Really, I’m lucky. Having someone as strong as you as my fiancée.”
 
“…”
 
“Charl? What’s wrong?”
 
“…Al, you’re a bit unfair.”
 
“Unfair?”
 
“Never mind.”
 
Charl avoided my gaze. Did I say something wrong?
 
“…Thank you. I feel a bit better now.”
 
Her face softened slightly. If my words helped, I’m glad.
 
“So, can we continue this conversation here?”
 
“That’s fine, but are you sure you don’t want to go inside? We could sit and talk more comfortably…”
 
“No, it’s fine. I just want to cool down a bit…”
 
“?”
 
I didn’t press further since I had no objection to staying outside. We ended up sitting on the ground, leaning against the wall, our eyes on the dark ground instead of the night sky above.
 
“Makina’s been acting strange, right? It’s not just because of Lucille, it started even before that… and…”
 
I struggled to find the right words, unaccustomed to voicing my troubles.
 
But Charl waited silently, her patience and kindness oddly comforting.
 
“…I feel like she’s [rejecting] me. I left it to Ross, who raised her like a parent, but… it feels like I’m making the same mistake as with Leo…”
 
Admitting this was hard, but I had to.
 
“…In short, I was scared to face her directly.”
 
Saying it out loud made me feel pathetic. After everything, I was repeating the same mistakes, and I was even afraid to admit my weaknesses.
 
“Al.”
 
“…Yeah?”
 
“That’s a bit uncool.”
 
“…!”
 
I endured. Somehow, I endured my fiancée calling me uncool.
 
“I understand why you think talking to her might backfire. Leaving it to someone else wasn’t entirely wrong. But…”
 
Charl closed her eyes. What was she thinking? I couldn’t tell, and it was frustratingly unclear.
 
“……The one Makina needs most is Al.”
 
There was an odd certainty in those words.
 
“It’s okay if it’s later. It’s okay to be a little scared… But in the end, please, make sure you face her and her feelings.”
 
“……Thank you, Charl.”
 
I’m definitely not cool. I need a push like this to face someone important to me.
 
……But I don’t feel bad about it. In fact, I’m a little happy that I can be uncool right now.
 
That’s something I wouldn’t have been able to do before. I can do it because Charl is beside me.
 
“Yeah. I’m ready now.”
 
I stood up and looked up. The night sky was adorned with countless sparkling stars.
 
Things I wouldn’t have seen if I had kept looking down. Things I wouldn’t have noticed if I hadn’t dared to look up.
 
“After tomorrow’s purification task, I’ll talk to her again.”
 
“I think that’s a good idea.”
 
My heart felt a bit lighter… Maybe because I was thinking about Makina.
 
(If it were her, she’d probably say something like, “You should invite her on a date now.”)
 
I chuckled to myself and turned back to Charl.
 
“……Since we’re here, how about a little walk?”
 
Charl seemed surprised for a moment but then smiled and took my hand.
 
“……Yes. I feel like walking with you now, Al.”
 
She took my hand with a sly smile.
 

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“So you were here, Makina.”
 
Under the blindingly bright night sky, a man dressed in all black appeared silently as I gazed at the scenery. He wore a familiar mask that hid his face; he was my foster parent and the one who taught me everything.
 
“So you were on the roof again. You never change. Always climbing high places when something’s up.”
 
“……Do you need something?”
 
“It’s a request from our master.”
 
His words about a request from Al made my heart stir.
 
I realized a bit too late that my slight agitation showed on my face, which made me annoyed with myself.
 
“It’s okay to be shaken, but I taught you not to show it.”
 
“……Shut up. Unlike you, I don’t hide my face behind a mask.”
 
“Is this what they call rebellious age?”
 
“Don’t mock me.”
 
It was easy to imagine him laughing under the mask, which irritated me even more.
 
“……So, what did Al request?”
 
“He was worried about you. Said something seems off lately.”
 
“…………”
 
He saw through me. Of course, he did. Even I knew I couldn’t keep it together anymore. Al noticed too.
 
“…………It’s nothing. There’s no problem. Tell him that.”
 
“Unfortunately, unlike you, I’m not used to lying to our master.”
 
“…………”
 
Lie.
 
The word choked me. I couldn’t speak. My chest hurt.
 
……I know. I’ve been lying to Al all this time.
 
Hiding my true feelings. Suppressing them, locking them away so he wouldn’t notice.
 
“……You taught me those skills. What’s wrong with using them?”
 
“But I also told you this: ‘Never lie to your own heart.'”
 
“……Are you saying I’m lying to myself?”
 
“That’s how it looks to me.”
 
“……So what? I have to.”
 
I can’t tell him. I can’t possibly tell him. That’s why it hurts so much.
 
“And you, you’re lying to yourself too.”
 
Before I knew it, the words spilled out.
 
“You still have regrets about knight and the order. You hide them away, acting like it doesn’t matter. ‘Never lie to your own heart’? You talk big. You’re lying to yourself too.”
 
……It’s no good. I said something terrible. Something I shouldn’t have said. I hurt him.
 
Why. Why did I. I hate this. I hate myself.
 
“……True. Saying I have no regrets about the knight would be a lie.”
 
“……”
 
Ross’s voice was gentle.
 
“S-sorry… I didn’t mean…”
 
“I understand.”
 
Even though he should be hurt. Even though I hurt him.
 
“……I can no longer be a knight. That qualification was taken from me permanently. But I chose this path. I have no regrets.”
 
He was so kind… And it made me hate myself even more.
 
“So don’t push yourself too hard. Alfred doesn’t want you to break.”
 
“……Yeah. Thanks.”
 
I couldn’t look at Ross. I knew he was worrying about me.
 
The person who raised me is like that. But I don’t want to see it now. Seeing such kindness makes me feel like my own bad parts are being exposed.
 
“……Sorry. I want to be alone now. Or else, I might…”
 
I might say something even worse.
 
“……Understood. I’ll head back first.”
 
Without needing to say it, Ross understood and silently disappeared.
 
Maybe he decided I needed to be alone to calm down… No. Maybe he thought he wasn’t enough.
 
I’m making everyone worry. I’m a failure as Al’s shadow.
 
—-Makina. I know your wish. And I know how to fulfill it. It’s simple. Because… You have royal blood in you.
 
“…………”
 
Over and over, Lucille’s words echoed in my head. They wouldn’t stop. These shameful thoughts wouldn’t stop. Just a maid. Not even in Al’s sight.
 
“……Ugh……”
 
I clutched my chest. It hurt. There shouldn’t be any physical injury, but my heart hurt so much.
 
As I bowed my head, clutching my chest—-
 
“—-Ah……”
 
From the rooftop of this mansion, I saw it.
 
Al and Charl, holding hands.
 
Walking through the beautifully moonlit garden… They looked so perfect together.
 
“Huh……? That’s strange… This should be a good thing… So why…”
 
My chest tightened. Dark, unpleasant feelings overflowed.
 
Lucille’s words echoed over and over, drowning my mind.
 
“……Disappear. These feelings, disappear. Disappear. Disappear…”
 
Just like always. Like the usual foolish maid.
 
(Do I really have royal blood in me?)
 
No way.
 
(If I have royal blood, can I stand by Al’s side?)
 
Don’t think unnecessary things.
 
(Can I tell Al how I feel?)
 
No way.
 
(Can I stop being jealous of Charl?)
 
Disappear. Disappear. These feelings, disappear.
 
Even though I want them to disappear…
 
“Why… won’t they… disappear…?”
 
The path I choose.
 
It will surely—-be only in the shadows.


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