Reset My Favor and Live a Normal Youth Volume 2 Chapter 1 part 2

“You’re late! And why didn’t you reply, you idiot!”
 
Despite all my thinking, the words just spilled out on their own.
 
“–Hanazono, I’m home… I just really wanted to see you without thinking.”
 
“Huh? Wait, what happened to you?… Hey, are you crying?”
 
I grabbed Hanazono’s shoulders. I wasn’t actually crying, it was just sweat from being tired.
 
I wanted to say that, but the words wouldn’t come.
 
“…Normal isn’t easy, is it?”
 
Hanazono just silently patted my back.
 
Then a overwhelming feeling of regret hit me. I had reset my relationship with Hanazono. It was an irreversible mistake.
 
Here, I clearly recognized my own abnormality.
 
Somehow, it felt like my sweat was getting more intense.
 
–And then I remembered graduating from elementary school and reuniting with Hanazono.
 
**
 
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continue
 
 


 
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The empty apartment only had a photo frame inside.
 
After graduating elementary school, I set down my belongings and started thinking about the future.
 
My memories around the time of graduation are hazy. But I feel like some major event happened.
 
I have a lingering sense of using the biggest reset yet.
 
A gaping feeling of loss in my chest. I’ve lost something important. Even though I lost my memories, there are scenes that won’t disappear.
 
Somehow I found myself covered in blood, hugging a motionless [girl].
 
I was screaming, but I don’t know why. Even with all the resets, the pain in my chest wouldn’t go away.
 
I made the choice to keep resetting and destroying myself, that’s why I’ve become a broken person.
 
[Why does that scene remain, even after resetting? It doesn’t matter. As long as I don’t “recognize” it, it’s not a problem. First, grasping the current situation is the priority. For now–]
 
Following Eri’s instructions, I headed home.
 
The place where my home used to be was now an apartment. My parents, who had sold me off, were nowhere to be found – Eri said they went bankrupt and fled far away. I didn’t feel any interest in that.
 
In any case, Eri told me to live there. I have to listen to what Eri says. As long as I follow her instructions, I can live a safe and stable life. From now on, I’ll have to attend a normal middle school and live a normal life.
 
I didn’t understand the meaning of “normal.” My common sense was only from that elementary school.
 
The empty single room apartment. I’ll need to buy daily necessities to live on my own from now on. …I don’t remember being taught how to do that. But this is a kind of survival, so if I just buy an instruction manual and live according to it, that should be enough.
 
From that day on, my daily life began.
 
I didn’t understand the concept of freedom. No one ordering me around anymore. If I dislike something, I can just reset.
 
Daily life was a completely new experience for me, and it was accompanied by pain.
 
I didn’t know how to use money properly and the shop staff looked exasperated. I never realized talking to people could be so difficult. I was constantly worried about being attacked by someone.
 
On my way home from shopping, a girl I didn’t know called out to me. I didn’t know who she was, but she was a very beautiful girl, and I felt a sense of nostalgia that was quite unusual for me. But she seemed angry.
 
Her face was bright red, and it looked like she was about to hit me.
 
[Why did you disappear… I’m so pissed off!]
 
[I’m sorry, but who are you?]
 
[Huh? Don’t you remember me? I’m Hanazono, your old friend from childhood! Are you making fun of me?]
 
The name “Hanazono” came to my mind. I knew her.
 
[……Ah, Hanazono. I only remember the name……]
 
[So, are you mad at me? Why do you have that look on your face. Aren’t you happy to see me?]
 
[No, it’s not that……]
 
[So you really don’t remember anything… or our promise…? I finally remembered, and you’re just a big idiot!]
 
I couldn’t understand why the girl looked so sad.
 
Probably, I had forgotten our memories from when we were in kindergarten. She was just a stranger to me, but I remembered her name, which was unusual.
 
[What middle school are you going to?]
 
[Me? I’m going to Bancho Middle School.]
 
[I see, we’re in the same school then. I’ll come pick you up tomorrow, so wait for me!]
 
[Uh, why……]
 
Hanazono just said that and left. I was perplexed. But she’s my neighbor, so I should be friendly with her.
 
The next morning, I went out of my apartment to attend the entrance ceremony.
 
Hanazono was standing in front of my house.
 
[Huh? Why are you in your regular clothes? Hurry up and change into your uniform!]
 
[Good morning, Hanazono. ……Uniform?]
 
[It’s not ‘good morning’! And you don’t have the designated bag either.]
 
[Hmm, I was only told to go to middle school. Do I need a uniform and a bag? I’m in trouble. I didn’t receive those.]
 
[Ah, what should I do?]
 
[It’s fine. I went to elementary school in my regular clothes too.]
 
[Wait, Toudou!!]
 
I attended the entrance ceremony in my regular clothes and was looked at strangely by the others. The teachers scolded me, but the principal saved me, and I got away with it. It seemed the principal knew about my situation.
 
In the staff room, I borrowed a spare uniform and headed to my classroom. The pants were too tight.
 
I was unusually nervous. It was the first time I’d been in a place with so many people my age.
 
–I wonder if I can make friends.
 
I had always been alone. So I had hope that I could make friends.
 
When I opened the classroom door, I was overwhelmed by the large number of students.
 
I could hear the buzz.
 
[Hey, that’s the guy who came in his regular clothes, isn’t it?]
 
[And his face looks super scary, too.]
 
[He looks kind of like a delinquent, so it’s better not to get involved.]
 
Hanazono was sitting by the window. I was relieved to be in the same class as her.
 
For some reason, Hanazono was averting her gaze from me and her face was red. I didn’t understand the meaning of that.
 
[Toudou-kun, just sit here for now. The teacher will explain about the school soon.]
 
I reluctantly sat in the seat near the corridor, instead of going towards Hanazono.
 
There was a boy with a shaved head sitting next to me. ……Should I greet him? Well, everything is an experience. I’ll greet him.
 
[My name is Toudou. Nice to meet you.]
 
[……]
 
There was no clear response from the boy. My words should have reached him. There was a sense of confusion and hesitation from him.
 
The reason for this was something I didn’t understand at the time.
 
Later, I found out that he thought of me as a troublemaker and ignored me.
 
This was the first time I experienced being ignored, and I felt an incredibly sad and lonely feeling that I had never felt before.
 
Among the many students, I was–alone again.

READ THE ORIGINAL TRANSLATION AT GADGETIZEDPANDA.COM


 


 
How much time had passed? My thoughts were just a moment. It couldn’t have been more than a few seconds. My consciousness was returning to the present from my middle school days.
 
……I shouldn’t just rely on Hanazono.
 
“I’m sorry, Hanazono. I also [reset] Tanaka.”
 
“Well, what happened anyway? Hey, you liked Haru chan, didn’t you!?”
 
I hid the fact that I had lost my memories. I don’t want to create a chain of sorrows. Guilt grips my heart.
 
“It was to not make Tanaka sad. ……But was that really the right thing to do?”
 
“Of course it wasn’t right! ……It’s so sad. Both Haru chan and you…”
 
Hanazono’s hand that was patting my back stopped, and she gently touched my back.
 
It felt like she was hugging me. I don’t have any memories of my mother, but it feels like being embraced by a mother.
 
“I’ve never really grown up. Is it really difficult for me to live a normal life?”
 
“No, that’s not true!”
 
Hanazono’s words were definitive and strong.
 
“You’re different from before. Completely different. So you should overcome this reset. I was able to do it, too! I’ll support you. ……Next time, let’s talk properly, okay?”
 
I nodded slightly. I couldn’t get my voice to come out properly.
 
I wonder if I’ve overcome the reset? That seemed questionable. Ah, so the reset hurts others because I don’t want to be hurt myself, so I’ve been hurting people to protect myself.
 
Realizing this fact, I couldn’t stop the sweat from pouring from my eyes.
 
My chest hurts. It’s painful, I feel like I’m going to break from the guilt. If I reset, it’ll be easier.
 
But I’ll never reset again. This pain is necessary as a human being.
 
“Haru-chan is a good girl, unlike me, so you’ll definitely get her back!!”
 
“……Hanazono is a good girl too.”
 
“Wh-What!? I’m talking about Haru-chan right now. ……Idiot, really, you’re an idiot……”
 
Hanazono cried as she hit my chest again. It shouldn’t hurt, but for some reason it hurt a lot.
 
Each time Hanazono hit my chest, I felt like something was breaking. Even though I had reset, I didn’t want to see Hanazono crying.
 
–Destroy the reset.
 
When I heard that voice, I suddenly heard a sound like glass shattering. From the inside of my body. Along with the intense pain, something was scraped away from the depths of my heart.
 
At the same time, some kind of ‘switch’ turned on inside me. My senses shifted.
 
Among the records of my thoughts, there were memories of my younger self and Hanazono. Memories of Hanazono that I didn’t know. Emotions etched into my soul–
 
Intense emotions tore through my heart.
 
I wiped my own tears, took out a handkerchief, and wiped Hanazono’s tears. Something inside me had changed. It’s not theoretical. This is what my instincts are telling me.
 
“……Hana-san-chan, I’m sorry for resetting.”
 
“Eh……, T-Tsuyoshi?”
 
My instincts wove the words on their own. My brain was bewildered and confused. Even so–
 
I gently touched Hanazono’s back. I had the urge to embrace her tightly. I was surprised by this desire, as I had thought physical desires were foreign to me.
 
“Stu-Stupid! Don’t suddenly call me Hana-san-chan. It’s embarrassing! Ugh, if you’re feeling better, I’m going home!”
 
Hanazono left for home with a bright red face…….
 
Is physical contact between close male and female friends considered embarrassing?
 
……Hmm, yes, it is certainly embarrassing. A new kind of embarrassment I’ve never experienced before.
 
I entered my apartment, grateful towards Hanazono.
 
I picked up the photo frame in the apartment.
 
When I took out the photo of Hanazono and me, another hidden photo came out.
 
The photo showed me, two girls, and two boys.
 
I don’t recognize any of them. But I know these people. My senses remember. They were likely the ones I spent time with in that hellish elementary school.
 
The reason I don’t remember is because my mind was still immature.
 
……Were these people… my friends?
 
The long-haired boy in the photo was called Shimafuji. He was clearly beyond the abilities of a normal person.
 
He must have undergone special training.
 
He called me Toudou. He seemed to know me. I could sense something in his gruff voice – affection, surprise, nostalgia…….
 
I’ll ask him about it if we meet again.
 
For now, I don’t need anything extraordinary. There have been no requests from Eri since high school. Protecting my daily life is more important. Filling in the gaps in my memories of Tanaka is the priority.
 
I head to the kitchen and brew some coffee. At first, the bitterness wasn’t at all appealing, but now I’ve grown to love the taste of coffee.
 
I pour the coffee into the mug Hanazono gave me, sit Pomekichi next to me, and think about the person named Tanaka while looking at my notebook.
 
“Move forward. For the sake of the important people. Move forward, to reclaim. Move forward, to change myself–“
 
Though it was just me talking to myself, those words struck deep in my heart.

 

Chapter 1 End
 


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