Geek Mob Mercenary Chapter 58

Mob #58: “Of course I’d beat her to a pulp!”

After the guild bought the asteroid base and combat ships, I went straight home and crashed.

Why’d they attack me when I immediately turned back after the warning and didn’t see anything? Must be something sketchy going on. But I’m just a nobody, poking my nose where it doesn’t belong will lead to no good. The protagonist would bravely challenge the Duke, but if a mob like me rushed in I’d be killed instantly.

Anyway the appraisal should be done tomorrow, so I’ll go to Animember and buy some new volumes and doujinshi after collecting it.

The next day. Still feeling worn out but I somehow made it to the guild.

“Rough job huh?”

“Getting randomly attacked takes it out of you.”

As usual I have Uncle Roanz handle the paperwork.

“Anyway, the request is invalid. For the acquired asteroid base and modifications, and the two Granthross G-22 [Bastets], here’s the breakdown:”

Uncle shows me the details. The modified asteroid base fetched 3.41 million credits.

The [Bastets], though no longer the Empire’s main forces, are quite popular machines, so each went for 4.07 million. Totaling 11.55 million credits.

Carrying that much cash around is scary, so I’ll take it all as intel.

“I’ll take the full amount as intel.”

“Got it. You really hit the jackpot this time.”

“At the cost of my exhaustion…”

As we’re talking, a loud voice shouts from the next seat over.

“Why’s that failure getting so much for not defeating the pirates?!”

I turn to see a beauty around my age or slightly younger, with long pink hair tied in a ponytail, glaring at me over the partition.

“The gentleman next to you didn’t capture the pirates themselves, but he acquired and sold off the asteroid base that was their hideout, and two [Bastets] that attacked him on the way back. So it’s not a reward but the purchase price. Also, the request wasn’t a failure but invalid. The pirates were sunk by Duke Ovar’s private security fleet. The police and guild were informed they recovered the bodies. More importantly, please take a seat. And barging into others’ business like that is a complete breach of etiquette.”

Then an angry-sounding voice came from next door, likely Alphonse Zeistol. But the pink-haired girl didn’t take a seat and kept protesting to Zeistol.

“I understand the circumstances, but when I properly defeated pirates, you didn’t buy their ship from me?!”

Ah, she emphasized [properly defeated] there.

“In your cases the ships are always total scrap, so we can’t purchase them.”

“Beating them to a pulp is only natural!”

“Then we can’t buy it.”



But the pink girl made a frustrated expression at Zeistol’s explanation. Then she suddenly glared at me.

“That’s right! Hey loser! Hand over the [Bastets]! As ex-mainstays of the imperial forces, I’m the one fit to pilot them!”

As expected, she spewed the kind of line that makes you want to ask who’s the real loser.

“Sorry, but that’s impossible. The guild already purchased them, so they’re no longer in my possession. Also, they can’t be used without repairing the damage.”

Uncle Roanz wearily responded to the girl, but,

“Then buy them back! And repair them flawlessly before handing them to me!”

She shamelessly demanded of me.

“Miss Anchovy Chantalier. That is clearly extortion. Will you cease immediately, or should I report you to the police leading to your arrest, subsequent stripping of your mercenary license, and direct plunge into sentencing?”

Zeistol’s calm yet undoubtedly angry voice rang out.

Alphonse Zeistol was initially popular as a talented and beautiful receptionist. But she’s ruthless with undisciplined mercenaries who cause problems, earning her the nickname [Princess of Order].

Perhaps wary of confronting him, the pink girl meekly took her seat at his threat.

“Anyway, give me my reward and application for the promotion exam!”

Still cowed by Zeistol’s intensity, she grabbed what she needed, glared at me, then briskly left.

Uncle, Zeistol and I deeply sighed.

“Why didn’t you retort? Those [Bastets] were clearly shot down by you.”

“She’s the same type as Yuri Pridilier, words are useless. At least she didn’t outright punch me, so that’s something.”

“I suppose you’re right.”

As Uncle and I expressed bewilderment at the girl, Zeistol joined the conversation.

“Anyway, that girl is a bit of a problem child…”

“Did something happen?”

“Not just her attitude and behavior, but she took an application for the promotion exam earlier, right? She doesn’t actually meet the qualifications.”

The guild’s promotion exams – to become a Bishop-rank require two conditions:

  1. Being a Knight-rank. Pretty straightforward.
  2. Completing a minimum of 10 each of [Combat], [Subjugation], [Escort], and [Security] requests. Failures and invalids don’t count.

[Combat] refers to conflicts between factions. [Subjugation] means apprehending pirates and terrorists. If war or piracy suppression requests are scarce, you must rely on [Escort] and [Security] requests to meet the quota per this provision in the guild’s ordinances:

[Mercenaries of the Mercenary Guild must accept a minimum of 4 requests per year that will involve combat (clashes between factions, piracy suppression, etc). Incidents occurring sporadically also count. However, this does not apply if no requests clearly involving combat (clashes between factions, piracy suppression, etc) or sporadic combat occur.]

“She seemed like she’d meet the requirements easily though?”

“For rank, yes. But she refuses to take [Escort] and [Security] jobs, calling them ‘work for incompetents!’ So she hasn’t done a single one. That’s why we keep telling her she lacks qualifications when she submits applications.”

Zeistol deeply sighed again.

Barring exceptional results like Lambert Realglaiz Ikri that warrant recommendations from above, normally those not meeting requirements can’t even take the exam.

From Bishop-rank, [Escort] and [Security] requests actually become more common. But Miss Anchovy seems to misunderstand that.

“She’s quite problematic…”

“Well, I should get going.”

Clearly it’s none of my business and nothing I can do about it. If she demands money or goods from me, I’ll report her to the police immediately.

“Take care.”

“Sorry to trouble you.”

I left the guild, seen off by Uncle and Miss Zeistol, being careful the pink girl didn’t spot me.

Right, let’s go to Animember and blow off this unpleasant mood!

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