Epilogue
The Revenge of the Puppet
Let me talk about what happened after the incident that would later be called the Revenge of the Puppet.
Erne, the mastermind and perpetrator behind the series of incidents, was captured by the knights after the situation was resolved. After thorough interrogation, she was put on trial and sentenced to death for treason, attempted mass murder, and the attempted assassination of Third Princess Krell Carreralonde of the royal family. She was sent to the guillotine. While there were many points to sympathize with in her motives and circumstances, what’s done cannot be undone. Though no one had actually died, she was sentenced to death through due process of law, so there was no helping it.
The Magic Museum that suffered damage is currently under restoration, and the Gate of Keys exhibit will be completely closed for the time being. Since the other floors can still be visited, I assume tourists continue to come and go. According to the schedule, restoration of the Gate of Keys will be completed in a month. Since I have no intention of going again, I suppose I’ll never see it after the repairs. I have no business there anymore.
Despite involving the entire capital, details of this major incident were concealed from the general populace. Apparently there are concerns that learning a single gate key nearly took tens of thousands of lives could cause turmoil. At worst, it might spark riots demanding the abandonment of all gate keys—that’s what I heard directly from acquaintances among the upper echelons of the government. I could understand wanting to avoid riots after the incident, so I conceded, but… The official nearby seemed quite frightened. I couldn’t tell if he was more afraid of riots or of me. Of me?
While there are many unsatisfactory points, it seems we’ve avoided the situation worsening drastically in the short term. There are still issues to resolve like the puppetization of subordinate nations and the whereabouts of the vanished Etoile gate key, but we’ll leave those matters for another day.
Both Princess Krell and I were quite worn out from consultation on this incident, so we decided to rest our bodies leisurely for a while. Taking a break is necessary.
For that reason, we’ve given up on Black Notebook consultations for the time being and have been spending relaxed days—then one such day…
~
“Oh, that reminds me,” said Princess Krell during afternoon tea in the mansion garden, seemingly recalling something as she set her teacup back on its saucer.
“Yesterday was the day of Erne’s execution, wasn’t it…”
“It was yesterday. Erne’s execution day…”
“Yes, 10 AM yesterday morning,” I replied matter-of-factly as I poured tea into her empty cup. For some reason, the rising steam seemed strangely fleeting. Surely just my imagination.
According to information spreading through government circles, Erne, the mastermind behind the incident, was beheaded yesterday morning in the underground dungeon of the western prison in the capital. Though major criminals would normally be publicly executed, since this incident wasn’t made public, it was quietly carried out underground away from prying eyes.
There was no helping how she was treated. While there were many points to sympathize with, the fact remained she had tried to harm many lives and assassinate Princess Krell. She would have to see it as divine retribution for her actions. At any rate, the possibility of her taking revenge on the public stage was now completely gone.
While it merely meant the disappearance of one criminal… Princess Krell had a difficult expression.
“You look conflicted.”
“I suppose so… The imperial government is really the evil one here. It doesn’t resolve the problem to erase someone victimized by the evil spreading within my own country while leaving the root of evil intact.”
“Indeed. So what action does my lord intend to take?”
“It’s decided.”
Princess Krell looked at me with resolve and commanded:
“Thoroughly investigate the inhumane deeds the Carreralonde Empire committed against Erne’s homeland, the Kingdom of Safirra.”
“Are you saying you intend to intervene in politics yourself?”
The mage of the 7th gate key does not interfere in politics. Instead, the agreement with the country is to provide as much as possible of what she desires. I never thought Princess Krell would break the contract, but… She declared firmly:
“I’m merely correcting evil acts. Saving people who suffer is the duty of a mage.”
“…Haah.”
I couldn’t help heaving a sigh.
While she spoke righteously, Princess Krell likely hadn’t thought through anything concrete. It seemed she hadn’t considered demerits like the backlash from her taking major action.
Dissatisfied with my attitude, Princess Krell yelled:
“W-what is it?!”
“Princess Krell. Just because you wield the mighty 7th gate key doesn’t mean you can resolve everything. If you act rashly with no plan, countermeasures will be taken and evil will cunningly hide itself. We might not even be able to grab its tail, let alone see it.”
“Uu…”
Bad guys excelled at concealing their misdeeds. This sheltered young lady didn’t know that. It would only lead to trouble for Princess Krell, who could barely live independently, to get involved in politics.
No matter how earnestly and politely I explained, Princess Krell didn’t seem convinced. She was still driven by a sense of justice to clear Erne’s name.
Honestly, what a stubborn young lady.
I heaved another sigh—and placed a stack of papers on the table.
“Eh, where did you take those out from just now?”
“I already investigated everything.”
As Princess Krell picked up the stack and flipped through it, she saw it contained the information I had looked into after the incident concluded regarding the Carreralonde Empire’s puppet states. I hadn’t been able to examine everything given the timeframe, but had recorded anything that couldn’t be ignored. It seemed they had done quite terrible things.
“When did you…”
“You may recklessly charge ahead, but I am Roth, your supremely competent butler. Leave the networking, intelligence gathering, and most matters to me. Also—”
I closed one eye and smiled roguishly.
“I’m not the only reliable partner, you know?”
“Huh? Who else—”
Just then.
“Hey, Head Butler! Preparations for the newbie are done~!”
At Falarua’s voice in the distance, Princess Krell and I turned in unison toward the source.
I smiled faintly, while Princess Krell—looked shocked with wide eyes.
It seemed I had surprised her as expected.
Feeling like a child whose prank succeeded, I faced Princess Krell again.
“Don’t you think she’s a dependable partner?”
“W-w-what is the meaning of this?!”
“It’s exactly as you see. Do you have cateracts, Princess Krell?”
“Not ‘as I see’—!”
Princess Krell pointed at the three maids—no, four maids—approaching and yelled:
“Why is Erne here?!”
“Don’t get me wrong. It’s all my ruse.”
“That’s why I’m asking you why!!”
As I tried to placate Princess Krell, who stood up and approached me aggressively, Erne next to me was holding down the hem of her short skirt, her face bright red as she writhed in shame.
“It’s so humiliating… I never thought that, at twenty years old, I’d be wearing such an embarrassing maid uniform…”
“As someone whose life was saved by Lord Roth, please refrain from complaining. Besides, it surprisingly suits you.”
“Yeah, you got it. I didn’t forgive you for trying to kill Princess Krell, but it looks good on you.”
“I will be strict. The maid uniform suits you.”
The three other maids glared coldly at Erne, but she seemed so embarrassed by her appearance that she didn’t seem to notice the surrounding looks and voices. It’s not that revealing, just about knee-length, so I don’t think she needs to be that ashamed… Either way, it’s a good punishment.
“So, what’s the reason?”
“That’s right! Why is Erne here?”
“Oh, right.”
I recalled and explained it briefly so that even Princess Krell could understand.
“I bribed the executioner and had Erne handed over. Then, the executioner reports the execution as completed, so within the Empire’s government, she’s considered dead.”
“But, what about the autopsy…”
“The bodies of major criminals are immediately incinerated after beheading, and death is confirmed from the remains. So, I prepared pig bones that resembled human bones and put them in the crematory in advance.”
“Quite meticulous, indeed.”
“Yes, unlike Princess Krell.”
“That’s one extra comment too many!”
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Princess Krell seemed somewhat exasperated, but there was also a hint of joy. When she heard about Erne’s execution, she looked sad and downcast. So, I don’t think this judgment was wrong. It’s okay to give her a reward, right?
“But, why is Erne here in the mansion?”
“I haven’t been told about that either.”
I received both questioning and protesting glares. As for Erne, after helping us, it makes you want to say something about her attitude, but it’s rather uncomfortable when she’s too submissive. I like you just the way you are. Well, I only like Princess Krell, though.
“You are useful as a combatant. Even with the loss of your left arm’s mana circuit due to the pseudo-contract, you can still fight decently. There aren’t many Fifth Key Magicians, and above all, you had the guts to cause a major incident and attempt to assassinate Princess Krell. At first, I even considered killing you, but upon further consideration, your mental strength is commendable. I tend to keep people I find useful, so that’s why I saved your life.”
“I see… so, I’m like a defensive member.”
No, that’s not it. As Erne seemed to understand, I shook my head.
“No. Without you, we won’t be able to draw out the person who ordered you to kill your master.”
“!”
Hearing that, Erne’s complexion changed.
“Y-you’re saying you’ll take revenge for me?!”
“Not revenge, pest control. I’ll just dispose of the trash infesting Princess Krell’s homeland. Getting rid of nuisances in plain sight is standard procedure, no?”
To be frank, it didn’t interest me. The distant dead were unrelated to me.
But as long as it pained Princess Krell, I had a duty to eliminate the cause. Anyone who tormented my beloved lord was my enemy. Besides, having more vengeful souls emerge displeased me too.
Suddenly, Princess Krell approached Erne and took her hand.
“Miss Erne. Hearing your story made my chest ache. To think my homeland the Empire committed such cruel acts against another nation’s people—I never knew until now. I didn’t even notice evil spreading beneath the peace.”
“Your Highness…”
“However, now that I know, I cannot turn a blind eye. As the Third Princess of the Carreralonde Empire, I will erase the evil infesting this country. Using all the power at my disposal.”
“So I’m to be exploited again?”
“This is important, so don’t interrupt!”
Ignoring Princess Krell’s threatening bark, I said to Erne:
“Let me be clear, you’re a major criminal in this country. If you’re discovered walking the streets or by influential government officials, you’ll likely be captured again. Stay on the mansion grounds as much as possible.”
“I’ll take that to heart.”
“Good. Now then, I have a task for Erne to handle right away.”
“What is it?”
I shifted my gaze from Erne to the three around her.
Since she had formerly served as an attendant, this should be fine. Yes, probably fine. Surely, it’ll be okay.
With faint hope in my chest, I conveyed the memorable first job.
“Teach these three…how to cook.”
“Huh…?”
Erne looked bewildered, glanced around at the three, then met my eyes again. Beside me, Princess Krell shot an accusing look saying ‘how could you’, but I ignored it. Someone had to do this. Someone… I convinced myself and endured the rising guilt.
“Um… These girls are servants, right?”
“That’s right.”
“Then why did you hire servants who can’t cook?”
“An excellent point.”
“No, that wasn’t an answer…”
Getting frustrated was understandable. After all, the sole reason for hiring them was their utter devotion to Princess Krell. Just that. Luckily Righley, Falarua, and Louisa could perfectly handle miscellaneous tasks like cleaning and shopping. However—however, cooking was impossible no matter how they struggled. Rather than burning frying pans, it was like they melted them—their skill was disastrous. I had nothing left to teach them; they were at a give up and reject them outright level.
And that’s when Erne, who had attendant experience, came along. I had no choice but to leave it to her given common sense. Please, I’m serious.
So—
“You all…grow from this experience.”
“Huh? Wait, hold on—!”
“『We’ll be in your care』.”
Righley and Falarua on either side forcibly dragged Erne toward the kitchen. More than going to learn cooking, they looked like knights escorting a prisoner. All I could do was pray for their growth and that Erne wouldn’t die of exhaustion.
As I watched their retreating backs grow smaller, Princess Krell murmured softly.
“Somehow…it seems it will get even livelier.”
“Do you dislike that?”
“Not at all. I actually prefer liveliness. Silent solitude is lonely.”
Princess Krell said this with a wistful air.
I didn’t know everything, but before meeting me, Princess Krell had been treated extremely poorly. I heard from both her and one of the few who understood her. She seemed to have had an agonizingly painful childhood.
She would likely deny it, but having grown up deprived of love, Princess Krell desperately craved affection.
Therefore, I as her attendant resolved to continue showering her with as much love as she desired. An overflowing amount, pouring from the vessel.
“Princess Krell…”
To soothe my lady saddened by recollection of her painful past, there was only one thing to do.
I smiled at her and said:
“If you like liveliness, shall we increase the goal to around ten people?”
“Why are you making this about having kids?!”
Princess Krell’s flustered voice echoed under the clear sky.
Perhaps the liveliest one in the mansion was Princess Krell herself. But the master being cheerful meant the mansion overflowed with happiness.
As long as she was amidst bliss, nothing could delight me more.
Today as well, my lord spent happy days.
Confirming that, I—formed a smile free of the slightest falsehood or deceit.
Afterword
This is my first time meeting you all, Akiyoshi Ankyuin.
Those of you who read through this entire work must harbor doubts about the notion that laptops are ideal as frisbee substitutes. Certainly, wringing out water with chocolate bars will not produce chickens, nor can calculating rulers perform cashless transactions. So it’s only natural to be skeptical.
According to one theory, in the Holy Roman Empire, hitting home runs out of the park with French bread was considered most beautiful. As a result, lightweight yet sturdy laptops were selected.
Additionally, as mentioned earlier, until several years ago adults were said to eat twenty asparaguses a day, but recently this seems to have shifted to drinking tea with depleted catechins. One source for this change was the dance feast on carbon dioxide performed by the theater troupe Whose Kid Are You During a play, which received thunderous applause and cheers according to insiders.
It follows that achieving a hole-in-one with cherry tomatoes would be impossible. I must also discuss the idea that it cannot be done.
It originated fifteen years ago. Researchers were astonished when documents discovered in Egyptian ruins stated that golf was played with obelisks in those times, overturning conventional wisdom. Faced with the new issue of whether dragonflies could survive entering the stratosphere by burning up, they took on this unprecedentedly difficult problem. But I’m certain diligent and capable researchers can prove that Frappuccinos don’t suit eight treasure rice seasoning.
Now then, I’ve rambled at length about the superiority of Pythagoras’s philosophy of eating weeds, but must stop here due to space constraints. Those who wish to learn more need only make curry three times a day to gain insight, so please give it a try.
Everything I’ve said is a lie.
Finally, acknowledgements:
Ms. Yusano. Thank you for the amazingly wonderful illustrations that vastly exceeded my imagination. Every character was charming and delicious.
Editorial staff. You assisted me in so many ways. I hear sleeplessness can be cured by sleeping!
Everyone involved in production. Thanks to all your hard work, this book was completed. I’m deeply grateful.
And to every reader, I sincerely offer my utmost appreciation.
I eagerly look forward to greeting you again.
Translator note: That was very fun novel to translate. It’s so refreshing to have male lead that’s not wishy washy and straight up professing his love anytime he can. Doesn’t help that Ponkotsu Princess Krell is very cute. The only complain I have is how Roth wish granting ability is too OP would kill any tension in the story and I wonder how the author will address this in latter volume.
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